My Lenten reading was not what I thought it would be as I sat down this morning for my devotion time. I assumed I'd be waving palm branches and shouting "Hosanna!" as this Holy Week began. Rather I was provoked to generous living -- generous as in Mary anointing the feet of Jesus with very costly ointment and then drying them with her hair. Which leads me to question: what is my very costly ointment? With what am I to be generous?
Truth is I find myself less like Mary and more like Judas. Yes, I pretend a noble heart and I desire a benevolent spirit but in reality my heart is stingy. Even in my "quiet time," it is more for me and less for Him. It is more about what I can receive than what I can give. And so during this Holy Week, I'm focusing on a generous spirit. I'm asking the Lord to make me generous with my time with Him. That this week I will listen quietly and watch intently as He walks again the road to Golgotha for me and accomplishes that which He came to do. That maybe this week I could be the one who sits before Him and wipes the tears with my hair.
O, Lord, open my heart to be generous this week in my love for and my time with You; and for just once, help me forget about myself.
Just an ordinary moment...
God so often reveals Himself to us in the ordinary day-to-day experiences of life. Yet we miss Him. These entries are to encourage us to look for Him, find Him, and worship Him. It's my prayer that my ordinary moments would spur you to look for your own.
"What He ordains for us each moment is what is most holy, best, and most divine for us." Jean-Pierre de Caussade
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Bonding
"Jesus came to create bonds, and living in , with and through Jesus means discovering these bonds in myself and revealing them to others." These were the early morning words I read last week as I sat on the balcony overlooking the Atlantic Ocean. I have to admit I wasn't sure exactly what was being said; and so I just sat. But as I watched the waves lap the ocean floor and the foam tickle its shore, I began to understand a little bit of Henri Nouwen's thoughts. We experience bonds in all types of arenas. Bonds between a husband and wife; between friends; between other Christians. But this particular morning, I experienced a different kind of bonding. Maybe it was the vastness of the ocean or the constant-ness of the waves that drew me to the One who is even more vast and more constant. But bonding occurred. And with it came unity, healing and restoration.
I think that's the nature of a bond. Don't you?
Just an ordinary moment...
Monday, March 8, 2010
Tug-of-War
I sit here in my "garden enclosed" watching the cardinals and yellow finches along with a loud woodpecker vie for the numerous feeders just beyond the deck. (A pair of white doves just flew by to their nesting place high in the pine at the edge of the yard.) Their song lets me know they're happy. Their number lets me know that they enjoy community. And of course, my feathered friends also signal Spring -- as do the shifting shadows and the feel of warmth on my skin.
This morning I had on woolly slippers and flannel pj's; this afternoon I wear flip flops and crops. This time last week, we were canceling Bible study due to wintry and icy conditions; today, I have my windows raised enjoying 70 degree temperatures. It's certainly a contest of strength when it comes to the prevailing season; and the one being asked to leave is just as stubborn as the one pushing its way in.
As I continue my journey deeper and deeper into Lent, focusing on the passion of the Lord Jesus, I am finding that during this season of tug-of-war when winter and spring struggle with each for dominance, that I also have my own inner battles -- my own conflicts and clashes between self and submission, trust and fear, faith and hopelessness, turmoil and peace, doing or being. And just like the seasons, I am finding both to be willful.
Surely, Spring will reign soon.
Just an ordinary moment...
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